That moment of pure realization.
You’re becoming new.
Do you like it?
Is that even real change?
No. It’s just your head
spiraling out of control
Everything, rushing back to you.
Your heart races
You tremble
You shake
Your nerves are on end
and won’t stop trying to tell you
“you’re fucking killing us. You’re fucking yourself over,
over
and
over
and
over
again”
You’re on edge. You’re not tipsy;
you’re completely drunk.
By the attention
the hate in your heart
the love in your mind
the worry you’re doomed to feel forever.
Your nerves are trying to tell you something.
“stop hurting your heart. your mind is being damaged too.
Stop fucking yourself over,
over
and
over
and
over
again!”
Every inch.
Every finger tip
consumed
dead
too much alive…
Nerves. This shaking
So much like you’re too high and
Just too weak to take it all.
Too weak to stop
You need to stop fucking yourself over.
Stop messing up your life
over
and
over
and
over
again.
Good stuff has sum jumps in the rhythm and flow but i think it might coincide with the theme and aspect of the poem. It is very engaging to the reader, its simple non-complex language leaves it unambiguous and relatable to the readers. Maybe a little better use of punctuation can lead to a smoother flow and rhythm. Overall good stuff kEep it up popo
ReplyDeleteThis is really good.. not complicated, simple in language, structure matches the content... I like it :)
ReplyDelete